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[I swear... ]

At 5:42 am, Mountain Standard time something clicked. Or something closed.

Everything keeps being finished and done, and they�re all worn out like my favortie T-shirt. They�re stretched and stained, they�re covered in cigarette burn marks. All finished.

It�s all very simple.

You either give up, or you keep digging in for some weakness. But when things are so much bigger than you, there�s no amount of power tools that can save you. No amount of logic can move a comittee, no amount of reasoning can push upper management.

This morning at 5:42 am, Mountain Standard time, I put my precious things deep inside my glove box, took a long drag off of my first smoke, a sip of coffee, and decided to make my life easier. I decided to compromise myself for the sake of living, and I put my principles in my car for safe keeping.

This cocktail of anger, resentment, disappointment, I put it back up on the shelf. I can start drinking again tomorrow.

On & on & on & on
Wake the fuck up �cause it�s been too long

More thinking results in less doors remaining open. Thinking results in the longing for a week long bender of illegal substances. A vacation.

What good do your words do
If they can�t understand you

It�s increasingly hard to unsell yourself on ideas once they�ve become a part of your being. When you fall asleep thinking the same thing, over and over, you know it�s time to stop thinking it.

Remembering is good if you don�t let it be the fear in you

6:22 p.m. - 2002-11-22


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