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No. I'm being as serious as fucking cancer.

"Dude. I'm so buying a swingline. Except, I want a red one."

"Jesus, Carie."

"I wonder how much they are."

[Checks website]

"Oh. Man. That's the coolest fuckin' stapler. EVER."

"Are you serious?"

"It's fucking RED. A RED STAPLER!"

"Kelly, Carie's looking at staplers."

"Nuh uh."

[Kelly skips over to my desk.]

"Girl. You better write your name on that."

At some point in time this weekend, I will purchase a metal swingline stapler. And, I will be excited about it.

This is what my life has become.

Be afraid, children. Be very afraid.

6:48 a.m. - 2003-07-03

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