Index - Profile - Archives - Notes - DiaryLand - Random ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An Eighty Hour Work Week. In the corner store I frequent in my pajamas to buy cigarettes, I saw a dirty mechanic, and it reminded me of one of my many one night stands. And I guess that makes me seem ultra sluty, but I can count them on one hand. I started counting time, the time I've been alone. By alone, I mean time spent by myself, even in a relationship with someone who was not emotionally present. It's working on a few years. My periods of celibacy are never long, no longer than a month, the exception being this recent celibacy of choice, and the one at the end of 2001, when I forced myself to go without sex for 6 months. That time was different, as I didn't have any options to stop. I was in Montana. Now, what I'm doing is far more difficult. There are memories to deal with, and things to miss. And it's spring time, though I cannot find the words to tell you what it does to my body. And there was probably more I wanted to say today, but it's Friday, and I'm exhausted. I didn't realize missing you was a full time job. 5:32 p.m. - 2003-04-11 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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